Why round 2? Well because I’ve already written my first installment of Latina Mess and I figured why not keep adding to this topic while I’m on a roll!
Today I will write about growing up as the ‘ugly duckling’ of the family because it still bothers me that I was made fun of while growing up by my brothers. Damn them! Damn them all to hell! Just kidding, this line reminds me of Charleston Heston’s beach scene on Planet of the Apes…I think it was Beneath The Planet of Apes after he finds the Statue of Liberty all busted up by the water’s edge. I guess the line really was, Damn you! Damn you yada, yada, yada. Where was I?! Oh yeah, so here I am in my teenage years (that would be 14 or 15, or maybe 17..hell at this stage I probably was 20 and I’m thinking I was younger. Back to the story…. I actually didn’t like being around my sister back in the days because sadly I was always in her shadow being she was the pretty one, with the blonde hair ( I still don’t know where that light hair came from) and the green eyes and the light skin and the beautiful white straight teeth…uggh! then the camera pans over to me…so my hair was dark, curly (yes dry too!) I was not light-skinned more olive or beige-wanting to be brown-skinned, I was skinny as hell, no I did not have straight teeth (more like vampire gone wild teeth) and I had to have brown eyes…more like “dark brown looking like black eyes”..why? Was I adopted? I wondered.
Hmmm, don’t bother trying to make sense out of this blog, hence the title “Latina Mess” for it seems the mess in my growing up years have rolled over onto my blog. To make matters worse my mom takes in our childhood friend when her mom disowned her at 14….who does that!?? Hint: She was hispanic. So now I inherit another pretty sister (biotch!) So now I’m sharing my life and home with my sibling looking like Farrah Fawcett back in the 70’s because that’s who she looked like, then enters the half-sister or sister as she introduced herself as and now picture Lynda Carter a/k/a Wonder Woman (yes another 70’s or 80’s celebrity) and then there was me….Olive Oyle!!! Laugh all you want but really I did not resemble any beauty out there with those two in the front lines.
To make matters worse, those two upgraded to , my biological sister looking like Vanessa Williams (yes the naked Miss America) and the fake sister looking like Zena the Warrior Princess!!! Can they get any prettier!?? So who do I upgrade to? Can you say “Shelley Duvall”? that would be the actress from The Shining with Jack Nicholson and wait…she played Olive Oyl opposite Robin Williams! Yep, I was not the beauty I wanted to be growing up, not a chance.
I guess I am coming across as bitter about being around two beautiful siblings while growing up, and yes…I WAS! After awhile you get tired of being the one carrying the paddle balls and rackets and waiting by the park fence while the two Miss Americas socialize and get everyone’s number. I’m too old to complain or worry about what happened in the past but I am happy at the best compliment my biological sister gave me. She once told me how she remembered me being the awkward, bony ugly duckling but as I got older I turned into a beautiful Swan…..now that compliment surely made me forget all my childhood drama. I won’t tell her I look like the ‘Crypt Keeper’ when I wake up because after I comb my face and have my caffeine I do look like I belong on the cover of Popular Mechanics…LOL…I mean People Magazine!
This Latina sure is a mess!
** To read the first Latina Mess post, go to my ‘Humor” tab to catch up. I will be posting more for your reading pleasure. **