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Life sure has a sick sense of humor. It was only a few days ago I began writing a humorous piece on death and decided to file it in my drafts and work on it later. It seems later was far too late since humor has no place where death is concerned. So instead of writing a comedic look at death and how insensitive some people can be in what they say or how they say it when expressing their condolences, I am now writing about the sadness on the loss of a friend.

Mondays are usually one of those “oh what now” kind of days but this Monday I was saddened to hear about the loss of a good friend and ex colleague from my previous job.

When I heard the news I can’t describe what I felt because it was a myriad of feelings from shock, to fear, sadness and loss. I literally began to shake in disbelief and talk about your knees going weak and your heart racing as if you ran a marathon. All this and more is what I felt today and there is nothing I can do but wait and decide if I will see my friend one last time before saying goodbye.

This brings me to another dilemma. I am so not into going into funeral homes to view the departed for one last time to say goodbye. There is something about having to watch my close friends or loved ones laying in a casket and remembering them in that way.  I personally prefer to remember them as they were as lively, funny, and full of life or whatever the case may be, instead of remembering them without a breath in their bodies waiting to be buried. That just isn’t me.

How true it is to take a friendship for granted and say “I’ll call her later” when later is never guaranteed? And when you find they are gone you begin to relive all the memories you shared and wonder what could you have said or done and never had the opportunity to do so?  When life throws these moments of loss and sadness our way, it does ground us, humble us and makes us put everything in perspective.


So now that I have used this post to vent, rant or just release some emotions, I say ‘thank you’ for allowing me the time to do so. In closing I must sound like a cliché and recommend you say hello, goodbye, pick up the phone or email and say what you want now and not wait until it is too late to regret not taking the time to acknowledge the friend, brother, mother, father, sister, child, lover, partner or spouse or that special person in your life.


Yes, life is good as it is short and not every day is guaranteed, so living for the moment is definitely allowed and much welcomed.


May my friend rest in peace and her family find the strength to deal with the loss of their loved one.